IFS Internal Family Systems BEGINNERS GUIDE! Week 1/5 | IFS An Overview

Week 1 | IFS An Overview

 

Welcome to this 5 Week Series on IFS Internal Family Systems as a beginners introduction to Parts Work.

 

My intent with this series is to share, in a user friendly way the basic tenants and fundamentals to Dick Schwartz Internal Family Systems Therapy.

 

Having the opportunity to train with the Institute as an IFS Lvl.1 Coach, and an ongoing student to my own healing journey, I will share the principles and practices I have found most resonant and helpful to begin integrating parts work into our day to day life.

While I will talk about the concept of Exiles and Unburdening in this blog, it is recommended to have access to a Registered Therapist when working with these more vulnerable parts.

A full list of IFS Practitioners may be found here:

https://ifs-institute.com/practitioners

This information being provided is for educational and informational purposes only. It does not constitute as medical advise, and should not replace professional medical consultation.

 

Through this series you will have the opportunity to practice on your own parts, as an introduction in how we can begin relating to our inner world, thoughts, and emotions, in a way that can help create more space, clarity and ease in moving through our day to day lives as we face the inevitable challenges, and stressors along the way.

 

I have found Parts work to be a pivotal tool and ongoing practice to help deepen my own self understanding in support along my path and experience with chronic sinus pain, stress and burnout. See my Personal story here, and why this work matters to me.

 

Initial Invitations..

My hope is for you to not blindly trust my words. If you are anything like me, my system operates best when I have full autonomy of my learning.

During your reading I welcome your skeptical parts to explore this practice through scrutiny, questioning, experimentation, and self curiosity.  If anything is every in doubt, trust your inner knowing.

 

Secondly, although this model is explained in it's theoretical components. I encourage active and embodied participation with the exercises and your own "real life parts". 

It's in the practice of these ideas that will shift knowledge from believing, to inner understanding and a felt experience of something different.

 

 

What to Expect in this 5 Part Introduction to IFS Beginner Series:

 

Week 1 | IFS - An Overview

What is IFS Internal Family Systems? - An Overview

What is IFS Not?

Why do I resonate with the IFS Model?

What benefits can Parts work offer me?

Who can benefit from Parts Work?

Week 2 | The Psyche & Human System through the lens of IFS

Meeting our Parts (Managers, Firefighters & Exiles)

Week 3 | The Healing Process - Befriending our Protectors

 The 6 F's of IFS

Week 4 | The Healing Process - Unburdening Exiles

IFS Process of Unburdening

Week 5 | Integration & Returning to Wholeness + Self Trust

Parts in Everyday life

 

Well, You are here now. 

So Let's get Started and Dive in to Week 1!

 

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Week 1 | IFS An Overview

 

What is Internal Family Systems? 

 

Internal Family Systems is an evidence based, non pathologizing, self empowering, root cause and restorative approach to psychological distress and whole body healing.

 

IFS offers a way of relating to our inner world (Psyche, thoughts, emotions, and bodily sensations), not as one way messages, but as a two way dialogue and relationship that allows us to gain deeper insights on the nature of our body, system, and it's needs.

 

Parts and Psychic Multiplicity

Dick Schwartz the founder of IFS, posits that as human beings our minds are made up of multiple sub personalities or "Parts" that work inter relationally as a system to keep the individual and organism safe.

Animated in a comical visual, a similar idea of the interplay of parts can be seen in the Disney Movie Inside Out 1&2. (I Highly Recommend watching!) IFS considers individual parts to have access to the full range of human emotions, thoughts, and intentions.

Alongside the system of parts, IFS builds on the practice of Mindfulness, noticing we all have within an inherent, undamaged seat of consciousness that can not only act as a passive witness to our experience, but also serve as an inner healing agent within (or healthy Attachment figure) which Schwartz refers to as SELF Energy.

 

Parts in their balanced state are seen as inherently natural parts of our personality.

As a result of traumatic life experiences, physical or emotional relational fractures (often in our younger more vulnerable childhood years, *though trauma/pain can happen at any stage of life.)  These parts take on BURDENS, extreme roles and responsibilities in efforts to help keep the individual out of harms way and to meet it's unique core needs.

Parts are loyal inner soldiers motivated to mitigate the recurrence of experiences of past pain.  While their intentions are pure, when carried with us into later years in life, their approaches can become outdated, imbalanced and less effective in meeting our present moment challenges.

Their behaviours while at one point of our life were necessary and adaptive, get stuck in a particular point of time, becoming over adaptive, reactive, irrational and over self protective later in life.

 

We see these commonly show up as experiences that trigger us into an unnatural emotional states and behaviours of reactivity.

In our interactions with colleagues at work, it sounds like, "An outburst of anger during a meeting!  I don't know where that came from. It just took me over in the moment. It wasn't my normal self."

Burdened parts show up in our intimate relationships, as repeating patterns of behaviour.  It feels like, "Just when the relationship is getting good, I always find a way to mess it up.  I don't know why I can't seem to hold onto the good in my life. I must be broken."

We find ourselves over worrying about an upcoming work presentation, scrutinizing every small detail in perfectionism.

We may find ourselves shutting down or escaping in relationships anytime it feels too vulnerable. Or the opposite clinging to our partners anytime they show a small sign of disconnection, over functioning, and over giving to ensure the connection stays secure.

As a result of parts carrying burdens, we experience ourselves reacting to life experiences, in ways our adult conscious self can't quite comprehend.

These are all common ways our parts are carrying with them learned self protective strategies from the past, and creating imbalance and additional stress in our present moment lives.

 

Not only are our parts carrying burdens from the past. Part's when faced with a problem, operate in silo's with limited perspective of other parts of our personality's goals and priorities. They are often stuck in conflict with one another and create inner polarizations which we commonly experience as mental confusion, and busyness of mind.

 

The goal of IFS is to become in relationship to these parts of us, to better understand their intentions, fears, and learned strategies, and with time help offer them the possibility of a more present moment connected, balanced, and Self Led approach.

 

Exiles carrying Self Limiting Beliefs

Another Layer of IFS recognizes that during a traumatic or painful experience, protective "parts" of us internalize and make meaning of the event by labeling "oneself" as the core culprit and cause.   

This involves the system Exiling perceived "unacceptable parts" of us that were deemed too vulnerable, and locks them away in our unconscious. These Exiled parts (Also referred to as our Inner Child/ren) carry our deepest pains, shames, and self limiting beliefs that we bring with us often unknowingly into adult life.

Part of the healing process involves meeting, retrieving and healing these long lost inner wounded parts of us to restore their original qualities of playfulness, and creativity.

IFS at it's core is a naturopathic healing process back to wholeness, balance, and full vitality.

 

It is a way of being with the human experience on all dimensions of mind, body, and soul that works to bring more harmony and self leadership to the system.

In meeting these parts of us with curiosity and compassion and honouring their core intentions, we relate to our thoughts, body sensations, and external behaviours in a more accepting, compassionate and supportive way.

As a result of practicing being in relationship to our inner system of parts, we are actively rebalancing back to Self Leadership, a refreshing experience of Choice, Self trust, and an Embodied Confidence in how we move through life.

 

What is IFS Not?

 

IFS is not a get fixed quick Scheme.

It is not a false promise for overnight miracles.  Though when practiced with intentionality, the shifting in how we relate to our inner parts and exiles, may offer sustainable experiential change, leaving you feeling very different than what you've felt in the past.

 

IFS is not a religion, cult or set of rigid beliefs.

The model can be practiced using both traditional western scientific views of consciousness, mindfulness and self compassion or can be expanded to included levels of interconnectedness with a greater energy, god, or collective consciousness, which Dick Schwartz is exploring in his latest work through tenants of a spiritual component of SELF Energy.  

 

IFS is not a moral/ethical instruction manual on how to live.

IFS does not make any recommendations on moral or ethical ways in which one should live their life.

The goal of IFS is to support individuals back to their inherent awareness, intrinsic safety, and freedom of CHOICE, which in turn allows for the opportunity to Self Express in one's own unique individuality.

I see IFS as a path of deep Self Understanding. Through practicing shadow work, it directly and compassionately guides us to meet  and heal the parts of us who do not feel like our true self, and in doing so helps unlayer the natural essence that we are.

 

Why do I resonant with the IFS Model?

 

Non Pathologizing & Self Empowering Approach to Health and Healing

I feel one of the biggest hinderances to our own healing and wholistic health is the belief that something is fundamentally "wrong" with us.  We are told, or take on the belief we have a inherent imperfection, biological or genetic condition, symptom or illness, an inherent defect that is creating the cause of our suffering.  This immediately externalizes our autonomy to be reliant on external support, doctors, and medicine, and shuts down our own capacity for inner healing.

In Contrast IFS sees individuals as naturally Self Healers, having within an inherent, undamaged SELF capable of leading the system towards balance, and healing. When reminded of the available inner tools one can learn to take care of their own needs in an empowered and sustaining way.

 

Somatic, Energetic & Embodied

IFS doesn't just limit parts to the mind and thought, but explores parts inclusive of the whole body and nervous system, as well as extending out to our behaviours.

It treats the mind body system as a complex interconnected organism honouring the individual an all dimensions of mind, body, and spirit.

In such we learn to use our internal awareness of interoception to relate somatically to these energies, sensations, emotions, feelings, aches, and pains as messengers rooted in the wisdom of the body.

 

Safe & Non Invasive Model 

Since the clients Primary attachment figure is the clients SELF Energy.  Practitioners, coaches, and therapists do not need to hear the full story of the trauma.

Clients learn they have an Inner SELF capable of being witness to and supporting their own pains, and insecurities offering the full opportunity for healing and integration.

 

Secondly, the IFS Process is built on a fail safe approach to meeting the fears, and vulnerabilities of the inner world.

By using curiosity and compassion as our compass, we give authority to the clients Protective Parts to lead the process.  By giving them hope that there is an alternative way, they are often willing to at least entertain the options after many years of tireless effort.

At any time the system feels unsafe or worried of overwhelming emotions, protective parts are given permission to speak up and share there concerns. This builds trust that we will listen where the system doesn't yet feel safe. And we won't go further until we've gained full permission from all parts.

 

What benefits can Parts work offer me?

 

If I were to summarize the core opportunity behind IFS and parts work practice:

It is the Rebalancing, and Reconnecting with our Inner SELF TRUST.

(Our inner intuition, inner knowing, and most natural and alive essence within.)

Reminding us how to live with courage, alignment and personal power in exploring more of WHO WE TRUELY ARE.

 

Through the process of unblending and unlayering our fears, and healing our unprocessed pains.  What awakens within is a renewed sense of inner peace, clarity, and grounded confidence.

From a newly self resourced place we have access to stand stronger in our No's, and more inspired in our YES'S!

The result is a more conscious, heart connected, choice Led, and Self Empowered life.

 

 Who can benefit from Parts Work?

 

Parts work is for the everyday father, juggling the priorities of raising a family, to the executives managing multi million dollar enterprises.

It is for those who shares in the human experience of having a nervous system that is constantly learning how to adapt to stress, and help keep the individual out of harms way amidst changing environments, complex schedules and priorities, and relational vulnerabilities in our modern day world.

While the origin of stress may fall outside our complete control.  How we relate to and cope with that stress is our unique human capacity and opportunity.

IFS helps individuals become experts in STRESS RESILIENCE, capable of dancing with the stressors of life.

 

There is no prerequisite for beginning to explore your own parts, only curiosity, and a desire to embrace and relax into more of who you truely are.

 

If you are excited to dive deep into your own system right away!  I welcome and encourage you to Schedule a 1on1 Discovery Call and we can explore together with getting to know some of your active parts.

 

Join us next week, Week 2 of the Series - The Psyche & Human System, Through the lens of IFS.

See you Soon!

Greg